I know it has been awhile but I can't keep from writing tonight. I feel like I want to cry and scream and make people understand. Why is there so much hate in the world. Why are we all looking for problems with people who aren't like us? I feel so burdened when I scroll through facebook and find news of racism and war. I hate that those I love have to live in this world. I hate that my children will face an even more uphill battle than I do.
All of these things makes me question why? I ask this quite a bit since it just seems like life isn't fair. I see people living in war zones and kids fighting cancer. I see so much terror and it makes me want to scream out. I wish the world were kinder, were more fair to those who are deserving.
I have to remember that there are also many beautiful things in life. Mainly my family and friends. I think they make everything sweeter and worth it. I have been dealing with kidney stones the last month and I have relied so much on my family. My husband has been dealing with my teary phone calls and doctor appointments. I am so grateful I have someone to go through the tough stuff with. My parents and in laws have brought me things to help with the pain. I am lucky to have such present parents but I am also very lucky to have married into parents that are there whenever I need them. My brother in law even came and gave me a blessing on the day my pain was worst and spent the day watching movies with me while I slept through the pain. My sister came and made me dinner even after a long day at work. My other sister sent me videos of her and her kids to cheer me up. My brother who is a doctor was nice enough to listen to my questions and my cousins and friends listened to me as I cried and supported me with their words.
I am so lucky to be loved in this world. Honestly life would be pointless if love didn't exist. I feel especially grateful for the people I choose to call family. My family has all different kinds of people and personalities. None of us are the same, and thank heavens we aren't. We butt heads sometimes but we stick up for one another. They make my world so much brighter and beautiful. I think family is the one most important reason we choose to fight when all seems lost. It is so hard to look around and not just want to give up but when I see pictures of my family I want to dig my heels in a little deeper. I hope we can all spread more love. The world needs it. Love is the only cure for hatred. Hope you are holding your loved ones a little tighter tonight. I know I am.
